Wednesday, August 19, 2015

Ode To Morgan

Morgan packed her bags for college today. I have no complaints. I will be living with her. But because we've been so focused on the good we expect from the next four years, we weren't realizing what "else" it meant for us. 

it dawned on EACH of us as we were literally walking out the front door to drive her to college that her lifelong "home" will never be the same. Life will move on while she's away; decor, schedules, diet, traditions, routines. NOTHING will be identical when she comes home. We boo-hoo'd separately and sniffled a little together. I'm having a bit of a harder time pulling myself together than she is though.

Here's my very pitiful public therapy in the form of poetry:

From the moment I found you in my womb
I planned for you to be gone.
My arms held your body
But my lungs held my breath
Just newborn
But I knew you'd be gone

I stiffened my lip as we parted a kiss
I KNEW you'd be gone
But you came home well-rested
From the nap you had taken
We had dinner, and snuggled at home

Off to camps with kids
Independent and gone
I've known it all along
But I picked you up tired
And hoarse after choir
And drove you back to our home reinspired

Graduation came and down the aisle you went
But this time I knew the drill
They would change your tassel
But it was no big hassle
Because you ALWAYS came home to my thrill

Then it happened so suddenly
It took me by surprise
I'd been planning for this day
But I didn't realize
It was really IT
THAT time had come
When you packed your bag
And it wasn't psyche or fun

Today was the day
I had planned for so long
But not well enough
And it stopped my song

The breath that I held
When you were born
To not get too attached
To give you freedom to soar
The breath poured from my eyes
In the form of rain
And the life I've been in
Transformed into pain

My baby is gone!
It's every mom's fear
But to snatch you from this would be love insincere
It's what you were made for 
It's why we worked hard 
To make you ready
To take the world by storm

Know this, Grown Girl
Every tear I cry
Is a unique memory
That we made in our lives
Every book we read
Every palette for a bed
Every swing set we flew
Every cake candle we blew

These thoughts give me peace
They build my hopes 
They remind life is precious
And we had it better than most

I will cherish every moment
Of togetherness we've spent

My baby is gone
But you come home a friend

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