Remembering Where To Cast

I think I might have the world's worst memory. I can't even remember the lyrics to my own songs that I've written! Of course, being in a congregation that posts the words overhead to better help the congregation engage in singing hasn't helped reinforce memorization. When I need to remember something about music I contact my friends Angel Craig and Lisa Plappert. When I need to remember something about my childhood, I contact Shawn Hughes. When I need to remember something about church business, past, present, or future, I contact Donald Currie. These people have impeccable memories! Thank goodness I have them in my life, or I'd be sunk! 

There is at least one area of failed remembrance that I've found most humans match me in, we forget where to cast our cares. We instinctually cast our burdens on the one we sense is closest to us. While that should be God, just as the posted lyrics have weakened my memorization ability, humans that we've been blessed with sometimes cause us to not allow Christ to be as near as he's suppose to be. These humans meant to be a blessing in life, be they a spouse, or roommate, a friend, or family, end up a source of pain simply because we're trying to use them in ways they weren't meant to be used. 

In general, women tend to deal more with anxieties than men. It's not that women have more to carry than a man, it's that women are more likely to multitask, giving them the ability to fester in their worries while juggling typical, daily stressors. Men tend to do ONE thing at a time, therefore they worry, but when they have to be at work, they are more inclined to shelve their worry until they're free to think about it again. This isn't healthy for any of us, male or female. While we may become more and more skilled at shelving an anxiety, the anxiety is still there, unresolved, just waiting.

Women tend to want the help of other humans to fix their anxiety. Men tend to want to fix the matter themselves. Yet again, either way is not the purest solution. I can't reveal the reasoning of frustration in men's behavior, but as a woman I can easily say that women stack more anxiety on themselves when they encounter the consistent inability of friends and family to listen or fix. Women get angry (or depressed, or resentful, or any other number of negative reactions) when someone listens but doesn't fix their problem. Men compound the issue by deciding to avoid even listening because they know they won't be allowed to fix it in the end. 

Spouses stew in resentment. 

Friends ignore each other. 

Peers become critical from their determined distances. 

All along the fix doesn't have flesh and blood. The cure can't be seen by the naked eye. The relief we crave comes from turning our attention away from flawed humanity and fixing our eyes on Jesus. 

Jesus said for us to cast our anxieties on Him.

If we see prayer as an unemotional religious ritual, then of course we won't remember to cast our cares on him. If prayer is a duty rather than a fellowship, then we have put a hole in our boat before setting sail and will experience the panic of drowning in the weight of life.

We may reach out to a fellow passenger in our storms of life, but we can't become filled with bitterness when they themselves can't help us. After all, they are merely passengers in the storm as well! But the Master of the winds and waves lives above the sickening storm. He alone can rescue us. 

We must be thankful for and gain health from the friends around us, but we must prioritize the fellowship of Christ. His ear is the only perfect listener, & His hand is the only perfect fixer.

Remember where to cast your cares. 

Cast your worries and anxieties on Christ. He's a miracle worker! 

Pick Your Grove

We do not get to choose our DNA. Our parents are who they are whether we like their life, or not. Even those who have been adopted; those kids didn't choose adoptive parents anymore than they chose their birth parents. We can't choose our cousins. We can't choose our siblings. We can't choose our aunts or uncles. We can attempt to sculpt our bodies, but we can't choose our body shape. We can't choose our skin pigment. We can choose our behavior and attitude, but we can't choose our personality. We can't choose our height. In these we are stuck, stuck, stuck.

There are so many things about the person in our skin that we have absolutely no control over. But there is something we have control over; which grove we live in. 

Natural trees have no choice where they're planted. They are utterly dependent on the farmer to know what ground and air is best suited for their successful growth and reproduction. But spiritual trees are almost exclusively their own farmer.

We are spiritual trees. We decide where we are planted. God only plants us with our permission. Even in His Supreme status, in this He chooses the role of assistant. He turns all power of choice over to us. I've seen many, many tree plantings in my time of living for God. I've seen when people realize for the first time that God is loving and generous, and has our best interests at heart. In relief they joyfully surrender all to Him, and in doing so they give him permission to plant them wherever He sees best. But over time I've seen some gradually stop seeking His sky for His rain of growth. In their stagnant state (brought about by their detachment from Him) they become dissatisfied with where He planted them, and they start looking for another habitat, hoping to respark their growth. 

I've seen other trees be given marching orders. God himself says to move from the place He personally planted them. God sends trees on an Abrahamic journey, a walk of faith into new territory. Lest we think this is some magical key to happiness, let me warn you with this insight; I've never seen a tree in this situation be glad about this move. When trees are transplanting from church to church, ministry to ministry, job to job, happy and psyched about the transitions, that is a carnal move, not a God-ordained move. Trees to whom The Spirit is being called to move generally have the wisdom to loath the prospect. They're like Christ, both led and driven into the new place.

Whether we transplant because God pushed us, or because we're carnally seeking greener pastures, when we replant ourselves we replant with other trees. We try to seek out our kind. But in our uprooting we can't be sure what we're getting ourselves into. I've never seen a tree eat another tree's fruit. So, while an orange tree may find a grove of orange trees and determine, "We're all orange trees! This is the perfect place for me!" You don't know if those oranges are good or bad fruit, sweet and nutritious, or bitter and poisonous.

How can you tell a Good Fruit tree from a Bad Fruit tree when you're not partaking of the fruit? 

Answer: You can tell by who the tree attracts.

If you find yourself in a position to need to choose a grove, choose a grove that attracts the pure in heart. The pure in heart will not settle for bitter fruit. They bring their children to good fruit. They offer their spouses good fruit. They present to their friends good fruit. And these people WORK to access the good fruit. They may have to pay a price to enter the grove. They may have to ask the grove keeper's permission to pick the fruit. They may have to travel far to be a recipient of the good fruit. Those who want the best know there's a price to pay to have it. And you'll know a Good Fruit tree by the caretaker. How involved is God in the daily care of that grove? Good Fruit trees relentlessly ask The Master to prune, fertilize, water, and weed. The more involved the tree asks The Master to be, the sweeter the fruit will be. 

On the other side of the spectrum is bad fruit. These groves are left unattended. While there may be an owner of the grove, it's not worth the investment of hiring workers to keep the area weed free. It's not worth the cost of pesticides to keep the place pest free. Besides, these Bad Fruit trees reject all intervention anyway. It's on the backside of nowhere, out of sight, out of mind. Therefore nobody has to pay to access that fruit. Bitter Fruit groves attract the derelict, the thief, the irresponsible. Bad Fruit trees attract lazy people who are unwilling to pay for Good Fruit, therefore they must take Bad Fruit. Also, as mentioned before, Bad Fruit trees have very little aptitude to surrender to The Master, if at all. They refuse pruning, they do not seek care, they don't want anyone caring about the weeds surrounding and the bugs invading. Their "Keep Out" signs are posted for the eyes of The Master.

Don't be deceived into having pity on these Bad Fruit trees. They KNOW they're producing bitter fruit, and they refuse to put themselves in any situation to change that outcome. There is a way to alter one's fruit production from bitter to sweet. It's by a process called grafting. Only The Master can do the grafting. A Bitter Fruit tree must surrender to God who will uproot and replant the tree in the best environment for the tree. Then he grafts a part of himself into the tree. If that tree will remain, it will begin to produce the sweetest of fruit. But if that tree is arrogant and prideful, they will not surrender to this process. They remain a Bad Fruit tree and your folly to help is more prideful than helpful. These, "I can help" attempts are truly all about "Me, Myself, and I." 

"I'm the one with insight to help."

"I'm more loving than others."

"I'm going to prove my power."

I point this out because I've seen trees in transit see a grove of bitter trees and feel an undeserved pity. I've seen well-intentioned (howbeit uncounseled) trees believe the Bitter Fruit tree "need" their presence and sympathy. They plant themselves among the Bad Fruit trees, then are forced to endure what The Master never intended them to endure. They reap the hazards of being with trees visited only by thieves who rape and pillage their branches with no thought of care or another season's reproduction. 

Meanwhile, Good Fruit trees are enjoying the joy and laughter of those whom they are generously supplying with Good Fruit. Aware that The Master is purposefully cultivating the ability to reproduce more Good Fruit again the next season. 

You get to choose which grove you plant yourself in. 

Surround yourself with good-tree folks to keep from eating bitter fruit behavior.

“No good tree bears bad fruit, nor does a bad tree bear good fruit.”

Luke 6:43 NIV

It's Ok To Be Tired

I'm forty-something years old. 

My mother birthed all of her children at home, so I live in the same town I was born in. I've travelled all over the world, but I've never lived anywhere besides Belleview, FL.

I've worked for only two bosses in my entire life. 

I've worked at my current job for twenty years. 

I've lived in the same house for twenty years.

While that sounds incredibly monotonous and boring, you'd have to live with me, attend my church, or follow me on social media to know my life is FAR from boring or monotonous. 

People view me as hyper, flighty, energetic, busy, adventurous, social, and a part of me is all of these things. But I'm rarely seen as, "tired." And I'm glad about that. I work hard to put and keep my BEST foot forward and visible. I loathe attention, pity, and drama. I absolutely refuse to be anybody's victim. When I am sick, or am dealing with trauma I want to be LEFT ALONE. My career keeps me in a highly visible place. I don't mind. My personality was created for such a role. But I know when I need solitude, and I've learned the health benefits of taking a break.

It's possible to take a break without quitting the job.

Thanks to our societies' media coverage of musicians and singers we all know how "weird" artists can be.

Guess what...

That's what I am.

By nature I'm a slightly bi-polar, emotional creature. And the very thing that has kept me from destroying myself IS the very thing that I sometimes feel is killing me; CONSTANCE.

To constantly work the same job, to constantly live in the same house, to constantly be in the same town, to constantly work out the same troubles.... This is maddening!

In these bad-seasons (and I've had MANY) my nature tells me that I'm suffocating. I can't tell you how often I've wanted to cut ties and RUN. I've had to ball-up and wait out intense panic attacks, overwhelming depression. When I tell you that you should be still, chill, and be patient; I'm not suggesting you do something I don't understand the weight of. 

It is EXHAUSTING being constant.

It's ok to be tired in your ministry. It's ok to be tired in your parenting. It's ok to be tired in your work. But it's never ok to give up. 

There is a true statement in our memes, and motivation books that says something like, "If you always do what you've always done, you'll always get what you've always gotten."

While this statement is true, it's neither a license to be immoral, or a magical wand allowing you to quit a necessary task. If you've discovered a new door, or new path, the slowest, most extreme of caution should be taken before setting foot there. The multitude of counsel must be engaged. If your personality is like mine and you find great excitement in exploration, you should invite and insist on trepidation to be a part of the scenario.

FEAR THE FLIGHT. If a person does not fear flight they are either suffering from a disease akin to Urbach-Weithe, or they've done so much flying they've gotten used to it. Likewise in life; if you've gotten comfortable with flying to greener pastures, you've been doing it too often. You should likely stop flying, and start growing roots. Start insisting that you stay and go through the seasons. If you've planted yourself by the rivers of living water, you'll come out of each season ready and able to handle the next. And only in this state will you FINALLY experience being the green others are attracted to.

A person shouldn't quit their job because they are sick of the lack of respect, or aren't being paid enough on the job. What they can do is start submitting resumes and applications for a different job while remaining constant in the current one.

A stale marriage shouldn't be escaped because there's no sparkle in the relationship. Remain constant in kindness while you seek ways to mend the relationship.

Children shouldn't be yanked from their school because there's a rift with a teacher, or another student. Attendance and rule-adherence should remain constant while professional conversations are hammered out.

Volunteers in ministry shouldn't chunk their service of edification because of aggravation in a department. Remain constant in your work for God while you communicate your frustrations to the proper source.

And never, never, never leave the church because someone has hurt you. Remain constant in attendance and volunteer.

I can give details into EVERY ONE of the scenarios above because I have faced and endured ALL of them. I'm not proud of how I handled them. But I can testify of having much more to show for my life than some others whom I've seen cut and run. I enjoy the benefits of multiple generations STILL working together in ministries because constancy was the one (and sometimes only) thing we held in common.

Because I've stayed constant to my same congregation, instead of fleeing to "greener pastures," I get to watch the beauty of grandmothers snuggle shoulder-to-shoulder to snap pictures of their grand babies. It's beautiful because I remember when they were in their thirties and suffered a painful rift. Their constancy allows them to share a present abundance of joy. My constancy allows me to witness it. Because I've chosen to be constant, I've beheld the miraculous love shared between the merciful. We're all still living peaceable lives together because we determined to remain constant.

So, you may be tired. That's ok. Just don't quit, leave, or burn bridges. Stick it out. You'll be glad you did.

PS: If you find yourself away from those you wished you'd remained constant to, say hi. That's an awesome first step. :)

Adaptation and Creation

Imagine the earth suddenly void of the oceans. They are so vast, our world is called "the BLUE planet." Even in all our scientific advancements, we still haven't reached anywhere near closure to what there is to discover about the oceans and all therein. Of course humanity would have to adapt to such a loss. We would need to find a new way to not merely survive, but to thrive. 

Those who allowed the sorrow of the loss of their oceanic traditions, habits, nutrition, & more to cause them to become bitter & angry, to constantly taut how much better life was when we had the beautiful salty water, with its incredible contributions to our lives, the more they would hinder EVERYONE'S ability to move forward. If children only hear how much better it "used" to be with the ocean, they may never see value in seeking what good their may be in the mountains, or in the deserts. 

In truth, even the mountains ecological system would suffer from the loss of the oceans. But somehow, someway we could find a new way to be healthy, & excel, & grow. Survival is coded into our DNA. Adaptation is just what we do. HOW we adapt is what we want to control & guide. "Controlled adaptation" is actually CREATION.

Even though God put it in our instinct to create the best we can out of mess & confusion, it's also possible for us to choose to NOT make things new. Our adaptation of choice can be to settle in the sorrow of loss, & never leave there. Others will move into the struggle to create. & they will reap the glorious benefits of "it is good!" Just as God, our Father & Creator did in the beginning.

He created. But it was without form. It was void and dark. So he began the process of creating NEW things to fix the old.

I'm not really thinking about oceanography, or ecology. I'm actually thinking about the loss of relationships & love.

The vastness & strength of love is bigger than is comprehensible. Like our oceans. The pain of its loss is as well. As it should be. While it's APPROPRIATE to appreciate the devastation of great loss. It's just not appropriate to not recover, adapt to the difference, & create new.

I don't know if God felt any sense of failure over his original creation not being "right." But I do know that he went into the process of "one step at a time." And with EVERY step of creation he said, "It is good."

So don't expect your process to be a "shazzam." Evidently, "shzazam" moments aren't the smartest. (Because, God of course is very smart about these things.) So, take a step. And rather than focus on what's NOT fixed, focus on what change you DID make. Then proclaim, "It is good!"

Rebuild relationships. Create new friendships. Never stop giving or receiving love. After all, GOD IS LOVE. He loves being shared. He is not limited by failures or fumbles. Rise up! Adapt! Create! Make new! Let God guide the process and you will thrive!

Guardian

Guardian
I know who I am...
Therefore I'm cautious with my open hands.
What I GIVE is free...
And I give abundantly.
But to guard this treasure...
So I'm not deceived,
I must be careful of WHO I RECEIVE.
~Denée Richardson

I learned as a child that protecting your reputation and anointing was WORTH the loneliness and isolation. God will always provide somebody to love you, and for you to love. There may be some dark "waiting periods" in between. But God will provide.

Be cautious. Your treasure in your earthen vessel is more important than emotional and human attachments, even with the friend you feel is God's provision. Never, NEVER, allow them to become so important you feel you can't live without them. Humanity, sometimes, has no power over whether or not they will never leave you. Sickness and death just happens sometimes. A force outside of the two of you comes to wreck the relationship sometimes.

I've learned that even when you're forced to lose who you love the most, the gifts and talents within will sustain you,, strengthen and inspire you. 

Know who you are to this world. Know your gifts and talents. Sharpen them. Use them. PROTECT THEM.

They will be what God uses to save your life.

Thanks to Lisa Velie for editing!

The Glory of Enduring

I used to have to think of really sad things in order to shed a tear. I grew up in a very demonstrative, emotional, Pentecostal church. In the altar all the people around me would be weeping, and regardless of the sermon topic, my eyes would be as dry as an old mailbox post! My best tear-jerker as an eight or nine year old was to remember my beloved dog, Suzy, who'd been hit by a car. A simple conjuring up of the day my parents told me she'd been killed and I could squeeze out a few water-works.

But then LIFE happened. An uppercut to the breadbasket, multiple slaps to other cheeks! Add to that a couple stabs in the back region, and good gracious! Now I've had to come up with some clever means to get the flow to cease!

Until this point in my life I did not understand the concept of "endure." I'm not sure I can describe my initial idea of what it meant to endure. Perhaps I thought it was for losers. As if the only people who had enduring to do were ones that had made some really dumb decisions repetitively and now were a public scourge. I honestly am not sure what I thought it meant to endure.

But, honey, I can SURE ENOUGH tell you what it is like now! And CLEARLY it's not limited to losers, because, uh, I am not a loser!

[In my best "preacher voice"]
I shall take my text from Dictionary.com, because nobody can say it better than a legit, acclaimed, accredited dictionary.

It's A Verb
The first thing to comprehend is that "endure" is not a sissy, whipped-pup, loser status. Endure is a verb. A verb means ACTION. If you are in a state of endurance you are working your head off!! You are not still or finished! If you are enduring you are engaged in high action!

To Continue To Exist
The next thing to know about enduring is that it means YOU EXIST, and everybody, be they friend, family, spirit, or foe, knows it! Sometimes when you are enduring, you feel alone. You may feel forgotten about. But I can promise you, the fact that you are enduring means you exist! And there may be enemies who wish you would give in, but you will NOT give in because you EXIST, and you exist because you are enduring!

Suffer Without Yielding
Another thing I have learned about enduring is that you do indeed suffer. But you suffer WITHOUT YIELDING! The most adverse and darkest forces can come against you. You may cry, you may hurt, but you will NOT YIELD! A fetal position may be your prayer posture, but you will not yield! You are enduring!

Make Lasting
The reason endurance is so important is because it kills two birds with one stone. It ensures that the right outcome is fulfilled, and it MAKES YOU LASTING! It hardens you. Not in the sense that you become a jerk to the world because you don't care what anybody thinks about you. But it makes you TOUGH! It makes you STRONGER!

Lasting, Recognized Worth
In the midst of the "enduring" process there is absolutely NOTHING that seems worth the blood, sweat, and tears of endurance. But you endure anyway! And the natural result, without you seeking for it, without you demanding it, is that you will have a higher valued life. People who may not even know the story of all you endured will be able to recognize that you made it. The ground that you conquer in the midst of your endurance will ALWAYS be yours! Anything, everything, and anyone of high value endured.

Truth endures. Truth has been rejected and persecuted time and time again, but it endures and its endurance has given it so much power it can set the hardest heart free!

A soldier endures. Soldiers endure separation from family, harsh living conditions, even the risk of death. But they endure and millions of people are free because they carried out the verb!

Oysters endure the irritation of a grain of sand, forcing it into a constant effort of endurance, and a pearl is the result.

And finally, Christ endured. He ENDURED the cross. There is NOTHING to indicate that he enjoyed a single second from the pre-crucifixion beating to hanging nude on a cross. He carried out the action of the word; he endured the cross and despised the shame. And because he endured we have access to freedom from the slavery of sin and death!

So, you may FEEL like a loser when you are forced to endure some things, or when you look around you and nobody seems to understand. When you are in the midst of endurance even the most well-meaning people can seem to add the heaviest weight to our endurance. But the greatest prophets, the holiest men and women in scripture, the most brave, incredible, people ENDURED. And if they would have given up when their friends or families deserted them we wouldn't have the treasures of their testimonies with us today.

YOU can do this! Do not give up!! Hold to God's unchanging hand!! Say like Job, "Though he slay me I will trust him." God has NEVER left anyone unrewarded for enduring all the way through to victory. Because you are still enduring does not mean you are in sin, or a loser, or unloved by God. It means one thing; you are enduring. I don't mean to be cruel here, but, so what?! Lots of us have and are! Cowboy up and finish this out! You are a treasure in the making!

Having done all to stand... STAND!!